This week's chosen prompt:
2.) When do you first imagine yourself wishing you were older or bigger? Write about it. (writingfix.com)
First of all, that question hurts my head a little. Is it asking when was the first time I wished I was older? Is it asking when do I think I would've been wishing? Or is it asking when in the future will you be wishing? I am going to assume the first. Although I am not, in a way, going to answer it.
When I was younger, I did not think that I was ever going to get older or bigger. I remember specifically in first grade looking at the third graders and trying to imagine myself as one of them. I could not. Therefore, I came to the conclusion that I would never be a third grader. That I would die before then.
When I was in third grade, I remember looking at sixth graders and not being able to picture myself as one of them, therefore believing that I was going to die before sixth grade.
This continued on. Every year I assumed that I was going to die that year, due to the sole fact that I could not picture myself older.
I am not really sure when this ended. I am not really sure it has. It just doesn't seem possible that I could ever be, say, 50. So, if I am not ever going to be 50, then surely I will die before then. Makes sense, right?
I'm not sure I've ever told anyone this....